Tight-lipped.Darlings, it's the 32nd Annual Carousel Of Hope Ball at The Beverly Hilton Hotel in Beverly Hills, California! An evening to honor past, current, and future plastic surgery addicts! Let's judge their dresses, shall we?
Pretty enough, but we're more concerned with her date, who's rocking a tuxedo jacket/open shirt/chain look that is normally seen whenever pornographers gather. Trade up, Brandy.
Cheryl Tiegs
It's a pretty dress and she looks great, but poo on her for trying to adopt that crossed-leg pose. Honey, that's for 22 year olds in gyno skirts trying to make their legs look longer. You are a legend and shouldn't worry about such things.
Daisy Fuentes in D & G
Pfft. You could have at least put some effort into it. Like, say...
Donna Mills
Now that's what we're talking about! She's 90 years old, looks exactly like she traveled here straight from 1990 with no stops along the way, and she's willing to lift her skirt to get her picture taken! Old broads ROCK.
Frances Fisher in Dolce & Gabbana
Okay, it's a little couch-y and we think any woman over 40 should rethink the wearing of a mermaid skirt, but we have to give the gal credit for mostly pulling it off.
Garcelle Beauvais in Monique Lhuillier
Now you know why so many go for the cross-legged pose. Honey, we applaud your self-regard and confidence, but you really can't stand with your feet apart in a floor-length gown. It looks like you're trying to escape it. Anyway, it's a fab little frock. Love the glittery, bauble-y strap.
Halle Berry in Yves Saint Laurent
Simple and perfect. But that hem could do with a couple inches removed, if only for her own safety. Are there no stairs at these events? Or do half naked muscle boys just carry the women around so as not to dirty their hems or trip? Or do we just assume that half-naked muscle boys are the answer to any of life's difficulties?
They are, you know.
They are, you know.
Jane Fonda
Oh, Jane. You continue to morph into whatever pleases you, even into your old age. In this instance, an aging drag queen. We're thinking the Miss Piggy gloves were a mistake, dear.
Expected.
Joan Collins
Expected, but FABULOUS. Alexis is in the house, bitches!
Mira Sorvino
It's not Easter Sunday 1974, you're not on your front lawn, and you're not 8 years old. Stop holding your purse like that.
Raquel Welch
She's almost 100% non-biodegradable at this point, but who cares? She's 115 years old and she's wearing a skin-tight dress and the hair of a 20 year-old who needed the money. She's a goddess.
Rita Wilson
Mrs. Hanks always looks best when she works a "ladies who lunch" look, since she is mostly a lady who spends her time lunching now. This isn't too bad, but the floppy tie and the too-long/too high skirt work against her.
Susan Lucci
[Photo Credit: wireimage.com]
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Labels: Fashion, Halle Berry, Jennifer Lopez, Red Carpet
