PR: Red Ladies and Jellyfish Girls

So that's where they go.

We've been enjoying Michael's bitchy sarcasm coupled with his kind of endearing need for Tim Gunn love.

But you guys, we swear we're not trying to be deliberately contrary here...

Model: Lenka

But we really didn't get all the love many of you were throwing toward this dress.

Here's the thing: it satisfies quite well one of the judges' largely unstated criteria for an unconventional materials challenge.

i.e., It looks like clothes.

The problem, as we see it, is that it doesn't look like particularly stylish or interesting clothes.

It's a basic red gown.

And to be honest, it's not very flattering to her.

All of his design points go toward utilizing the materials well to make a believable garment.

But in terms of style? No way. If this was a dress made out of actual fabric it would still be a middle-of-the-pile dress. Good, but not a top score.

Tim Gunn's workroom:



All of y'all complaining that the extra thirty minutes just means more commercials are wrong and should be publicly flogged for it. This classic "wooly balls" moment has been brought to you by Brawny paper towels, whiners. We'll take the extra ads if it means more moments like this.

And y'know? Kristin should be thankful too. Because not only has she been immortalized in PR history with this moment...

Model: Kaven

It also took all the focus off this horrid dress.

We want to use more 19th Century spinster words like "horrid" in our day-to-day lives. Those bitches really knew how to express their distaste.

"Dreadful." That's another good one.

This dress is both horrid and dreadful.

It literally looks like paper doll clothes. There's no fit whatsoever. It just lays on top of her. When she turned around, we half expected her to be naked with little paper tabs folded over holding the "garment" in place.

You can chalk this up to our cynicism, but we don't know how anyone can be a challenger in the 8th season of Project Runway and be this rudderless when it comes to an unconventional materials challenge.

And to be fair, that goes for all the worst of the lot. How could you not have some sort of game plan for ... we don't know... a paper dress, at the very least? It's all in the prep, people! Here's our standard advice whenever someone tells us they're thinking of trying out for Project Runway. Copy and paste minions:

1)Practice on a variety of sewing machines, including industrial versions;
2)Fine tune your draping and pattern-making skills so you can do it on a dime;
3)Do the at-home versions of a couple standard challenges within the time constraints of the show, including some form of an unconventional materials challenge;
4) Immerse yourself in the previous 6 months to a year of fashion reportage. What are the trends, according to the editors of the industry?
5)Practice being a whacky character. Add a couple dozen sound bites and catch words to your repertoire. Convince yourself that everyone wants to know every single thought that pops into your head.

But this? This was just a lot of stuff glued together into a vaguely dresslike form. No style or consideration given to proportions or color or texture. Just throw it on the dress form to see what sticks. Once again, she's damn lucky to have Kaven, who really is the best of the lot. The model-choosing process seems to be erratic and ill-defined this season. If Kaven's ever really up for grabs, someone's going to snatch her. If they're smart.

Tim Gunn's workroom:




[Screencaps: projectrungay.blogspot.com - Video Credit: myLifetime.com - Photo Credit: Barbara Nitke/myLifetime.com]

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